Step son?

When people see the other child, they naturally assume he’s my son, and a twin to our other toddler seeing as they are both the same age. We got a few strange looks from our neighbours at first when they noticed an extra child staying at our house. I think most aren’t really sure what’s up, and haven’t really gotten around to asking.

One thing that I find a bit weird is how I refer to the other child. I guess, the best definition is that he is my ‘step child.’  However, even that term doesn’t really fit. A step child is a child that existed before you were married. In my case, this child showed up after my husband and I had already been together for almost 9 years. So mostly I refer to him as ‘my husbands son.’  What else can I call him?

Saying goodbye…

My youngest is almost 8 months and for the last few weeks I’ve been going through my usual ‘mourning period.’  And no, I’m not talking about my menstrual cycle.  After I had my first child, I went through a brief time where I really missed my life before kids and I felt as though I was ‘mourning’ the loss of that life. And now with my second child, I’m going through it again.

When I see child-less friends or couples, I get so envious of the freedom they don’t know they even have. They get to sleep in! They don’t smell like poo, and don’t have pee on their shirt. They get to make plans at the drop of a hat, they can come and go as they please. Their living rooms aren’t cluttered with toys.  They don’t use the word “Booger” on a regular basis.  Oh the life!

Now that I have kids, it’s not very often that I get time to myself. Before kids, I went to the spa monthly for hour long facials, nowadays, time to myself means a 5 minute appointment to get my eyebrows threaded. Despite the fact that I can feel each and every hair being ripped out of my skin, that 5 minutes is pure bliss.

Don’t get me wrong, I love my kids and wouldn’t give em up for anything. But having kids was life changing, and your never given the chance to ‘mourn’ for your old life. So to my old life; I miss you dearly. I never appreciated you enough when I had you and now you are gone. When my kids are old enough to move out, we will be together again.